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Extreme self-esteem interference in my relationship

2022.01.24 12:04 abstru Extreme self-esteem interference in my relationship

Hi all,
To preface, I am aware that this is an extremely toxic thing to do and I'm not sure if it's a result of BPD (Not officially diagnosed just yet but multiple therapists have suspected that I have it.) Not trying to self-diagnose, just trying to make sense of these emotions.
My boyfriend is gracious and understanding of me, but I just can't help but make problems from nothing. I assume that every girl he sees, he's attracted to. He always reassures me that's not the case.
Multiple times, I've cried to him and wished horrible things on other girls, such as social exile, just because I felt so jealous of them. He has told me that this is alarming to him. I don't truly mean it, but I can't stand seeing attractive people, especially people that are more attractive than me. I want nothing but hell for them. I've dealt with bad treatment in the past for being fat growing up, and now that I'm older, though it doesn't happen as much anymore, I still feel horrible about myself and resent those who look better. They make me feel so indescribably angry.
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2022.01.24 12:04 Ricco121 Martial Arts Monday 👊🐶🤚 I’m all in.

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2022.01.24 12:04 xcx_cxc How do I (17m) get over this feeling about my ex (17f)

Im 17 years old right now and I had a relationship with this girl for about 2 years. We dated for 1.5 years and then we broke up around July of last year due to personal issues and attempted to try again last October; it did not succeed.
I’ve gone no contact and removed them from my life as much as I can and I am still very much struggling. There’s a lot of backstory to tell and I’m unsure if I have time so I’ll give the nitty gritty.
During our time together, there was this boy that had an interest in her. They had similar clubs, sports and outside jobs (she had offered him a job where she works because they’re both lifeguards) and I was worried something was happening. She reassured me saying that nothing was up and that he was just a friend. I believed her and that wasn’t the cause for the first breakup. We attempt again and we try and sort our differences but it fails. I notice that they grow closer together and I cut her out of my life knowing that they would eventually be together.
Im 99% sure that are dating now and I feel blindsided. I trusted them and I believed them and I just got lied to. Even after the initial breakup we tried to remain friends.
I have them removed out of my life outside or school and classes and I can’t get over this feeling. I’ve posted multiple posts about this prior to today and I need some sort of advice to help me through this. I don’t know why I’m feeling this, I got all of my closure and answers I needed.
They didn’t want me, they left me so why do I long for the feeling again, I don’t know why I miss something that mistreated me so badly.
TLDR: had a relationship for about 2 years, got lied to, ex is probably seeing someone else that told me not to worry about, feeling a feeling that I can’t remove and hurting all the way through
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2022.01.24 12:04 Henrik207 Is he more usefull with frustration or without?

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2022.01.24 12:04 JustSomeDudeFromHD Earn REAL crypto in this Play2Earn mining Simulator game! 1000 Satoshi sign up bonus! Double rewards!

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2022.01.24 12:04 wackyuser87 just want to sleep this whole week i dont want to be conscious

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2022.01.24 12:04 KeyboardGunner Tesla Model S Plaid Teardown Kick off and Frunk Removal

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2022.01.24 12:04 Sleepiboisleep If you are convinced to do something because you see one post about it… it’s a you problem

All the options/DRS posts are important. It’s about time we killed the singularity and go back to hive minds. But that takes all of us being willing to listen and learn. If you see one post on options and throw your life saving into them. You my friend get the biggest Retard sticker. If you are DRS’ing just because “this is the way” you get a smaller sticker but still come on man! It’s time to expand that smooth brain of yours! And if you’re not the learning type, don’t worry just stay right there with those crayons in your nose. (Let me know how the orange one tastes)… We are educating each other everyday and we need to start feeling comfortable enough to learn new things. Fear is the first letter in FUD. Being afraid of the market means you’ve already let them control you. The more we learn and the more tools we have the better. Buy. Hold. Exercise. DRS. They all add fuel to the rocket. I’ll finish by saying something I say to my family all the time. “I love you all. But fuckkkkkk you guysss” 
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2022.01.24 12:04 whattaUwant What do you think would lead to the USA Government implementing a mandatory draft with the potential war in Ukraine?

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2022.01.24 12:03 vovr Best EU countries that offer high rental property yields? (8-10%?)

In my city the yields are only 4-5% so I am looking for alternatives.
What other EU countries offer 8-10% rental property yields and are relatively investor friendly?
Can you recommend me a good city for rental investments?
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2022.01.24 12:03 International-Mud168 DISCORD LEAKS!!!

https://discord.gg/C33jrGBuQQ GREAT DISCORD LEAKS!
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2022.01.24 12:03 Wutbot1 Wutbot on "Animal, Kid, Pet": [r/Animals] Hi my name is Tyler I work as a kennel tech at pet lodge pet resort in Alpharetta GA and I work with a bunch of awesome animals who desperately need a foster or a home. This is avri she is 4 years old and very sweet she would thrive as a only fur baby she...

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2022.01.24 12:03 NillionNeo What is this yellow part called? 2000 Workhorse chassis (winnebago)

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2022.01.24 12:03 M3chdrag0n Kjell

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2022.01.24 12:03 dustcore025 Obligatory "we are here" VW squeeze chart.

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2022.01.24 12:03 idunno53 Join the Top NFTs Holders Discord Server! They’re giving away all their NFT’s

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2022.01.24 12:03 prissyjoseph How do I convert JumpTask tokens to BNB?

I started using the new JumpTask mode and I’ve accumulated some JMPT but want to convert these to BNB so that it can cover my gas fees when I swap the JMPMT to another token. I want to preface it by saying I’m new to crypto.
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2022.01.24 12:03 wallofsound1974 Forteresse - Métal Noir Québécois @ Season Of Mist Europe now

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2022.01.24 12:03 Circumsizedsuicide When did you mature?

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2022.01.24 12:03 Curl0 Summoner deals too much damage?

Hey folks,
so I've been playing Calamity for a while now with my friend, he's going summoner and I'm playing a mage. And throughout the whole game, he consistently deals more damage than me no matter the summons, like most of the time it's not by that much, but often enough its at least twice as much.
I've always found it weird, since I read that the summoner class dealt overall the least damage.. since you pretty much don't have to focus on anything other that dodge.
Recently he even started using a melee weapon while having summons out, and he deals even more damage, even though minions are supposed to deal less while having a non-summon weapon?
Last fight was Polterghast, and while I dealt around 200k or so, he was at whopping 600k (?!).
For me personally it kinda bothers me, since he can just focus on running away, and I have to focus so hard to dodge and manage mana while trying to hit the bosses..
I dunno, I'm being a bit whiny, but it is a bit frustrating... I guess I'm kinda competitive
So are summoners supposed to be super busted or are they just bugged?
submitted by Curl0 to CalamityMod [link] [comments]


2022.01.24 12:03 lustrous_heart MBL e PSOL: Kim Kataguiri e Marcelo Freixo discutem "perdão ao PT"

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2022.01.24 12:03 Eidolon-6714423 An interesting title.

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2022.01.24 12:03 spatzkingprime being banned from another subreddit cause of you guys

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2022.01.24 12:03 koylu_faruk Rizelilere söven bi eleman vardı noldu ona kaç aydır ortalıklarda yok ?

Lord gelince gitmiş sanırım
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2022.01.24 12:03 JUFULIZA HEHEHE SUIIIII!

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