2021.12.09 10:41 Imabigdill I’ve posted here before about struggles with getting my dog to eat. I’m wondering if it has to due with me being in the room or not?
He seems to eat better if I’ve left the room. What does this mean in a dogs mind? Do I make him uncomfortable or feel unsafe where he can’t eat around me?
submitted by Imabigdill to Dogtraining [link] [comments]
2021.12.09 10:41 poopguy23 Desperate post
I relapsed and desperately don't want to lose everything. I just drank three shots after a three day binge and have my booster shot at 2pm. My gf is coming over after her shift at 9pm. It seems like the perfect excuse for feeling shitty but I'm worried about a seizure. Any advice would be appreciated. Can I drink mouthwash if needed?
submitted by poopguy23 to dryalcoholics [link] [comments]
2021.12.09 10:41 surveycircle_bot Bewertungsportale für Arbeitgeber
|submitted by surveycircle_bot to SurveyCircle_de [link] [comments]|
2021.12.09 10:41 PaJora Older drawing I did of the funni spaghetti skeleton from that hit indie game
|submitted by PaJora to MeatCanyon [link] [comments]|
2021.12.09 10:41 pkksmt Uusi-Seelanti aikoo kieltää tupakan kokonaan tulevilta aikuisilta – keinona nouseva ikäraja [2027 voimaan tuleva laki kieltäisi tupakkatuotteiden myynnin vuonna 2008 syntyneille ja kiellon ikäraja nousisi vuosi vuodelta.]
|submitted by pkksmt to Suomi [link] [comments]|
2021.12.09 10:41 ShortAlgo $FLDM Waiting for Buy signal on FLDM https://t.co/Sicyd4r62d
|submitted by ShortAlgo to UltraAlgo [link] [comments]|
2021.12.09 10:41 rsysreddit Super Dangerous Club: Episode #1 - Are governments taking things too far? #CENSORSHIP #CORRUPTION and #DICTATORSHIP
|submitted by rsysreddit to cryptostreetbets [link] [comments]|
2021.12.09 10:41 DegreeOk3444 What are your views on religion?
2021.12.09 10:41 Impressive_Drama_745 Need this solved
2021.12.09 10:41 krappy1107 Xavi be like...........
|submitted by krappy1107 to footballmemes [link] [comments]|
2021.12.09 10:41 veganamos Starting to gain momentum
I really started focusing on doing the things in the program that were taught to me instead of focusing on the abstinence. Such as going to meetings, calling people, reading literature, and praying. I am on day 11 and wow are things different. There isn't this sense of hopelessness.
The main reason I am writing this is to remember I am also powerless over this stuff. I need to remember I NEED this, not just AA. Y'all are important to me and mean so much. I am glad that sanity is coming back.
One last thing, I took out some inner circle behaviors with the approval of my sponsor, and we made guidelines for the behaviors. I have been following the guidelines and it is really showing me that I can do this and live happily every day.
submitted by veganamos to SEXAA [link] [comments]
2021.12.09 10:41 IGotATurtle [15m] Looking for friends to game or talk to over the upcoming winter break!
hey everyone, I’m just a person trying to make some new friendships over the break!
i game on pc, currently trying to get better at valorant but i also enjoy streaming and playing single player games with my friends
little bit about me - i play the violin (also in an orchestra!), i live in canada, i have a cat named latte, and i like baking. My favourite type of music is hard rock but i can literally listen to anything - except for country
dm me, don’t be dry pls it’s hard holding a conversation when all you say is “yes”, “no”, and “ok”
submitted by IGotATurtle to TeensMeetTeens [link] [comments]
2021.12.09 10:41 throwaway_1morechanc I (33m) don’t know whether to give my gf (34f) another chance
There's a lot going on in my head and there's a lot of background information so please bear with me. I've attempted a tdlr version at the end.
I have been with my girlfriend for six years. I graduated and went to work in a different country (let's call it A) for many years where I met my gf, and in Jan 2021 we moved to my home country (let's call it B) with a serious view of taking our relationship to the next level. We both have good jobs. I know that to relocate somewhere new for someone's sake is a big deal, but I tried to make sure she was comfortable beforehand - 1) she met my family and friends many times during our visits, 2) she has a few good school friends here, 3) her former boss/mentor is also here. Ethnically/culturally it was somewhat similar as well. So she's not exactly in a completely foreign land. Anyway, I knew I had to help make things as comfortable for her as possible.
That's where the trouble began.
I set a rental budget of $4k and hoped to find a spacious 2 bedroom on the city fringe in a comfortable middle class area. However the choices were way below the standards that my gf had; out of the dozen or so apartments we viewed she only went for 3-4 as she got so disappointed she stopped going. I admit there were a few bad eggs in there but I thought the rest were fine. Subsequently she arranged her own viewings in a very central/expat area and she found a unit she loved. It cost 50% more than I budgeted. I asked her to chip in to cover the excess but she refused on the grounds that she was already paying a mortgage back home (in country A which is expensive to live in). In the end she verbally agreed to contribute a few hundred dollars and I signed the lease with the view of 1) making her comfortable, and 2) trying to view this as a "treat" to myself after working so hard for so many years (I was trying hard to convince myself). Fast forward to today, she has not paid me a cent. Her argument is I didn't give her my bank account details, but I felt awkward to go up to her and say "hey your share of the rent is due, could you pay me? These are my details". Normally before I can say the last sentence she gets annoyed that I'm asking for money. I gave up and decided to write my account details on a whiteboard we have in the kitchen for noting stuff down; she has definitely seen it but hasn't done anything.
Anyway, there's more.
I handled the lease signing and also the delivery of our belongings that were shipped over. I tidied and unpacked as much as I could by myself, again with the view of easing her in. When we finally moved in she complained about a few problems with the flat and it's contents (some of her unpacked stuff were broken eg old perfume bottles; glass souvenir cup; the balcony door was too thin and we could hear the traffic on the road). The shower head and water pressure was also not strong enough for her (it felt fine to me). She told me off for not testing the water before the agent passed over the keys to me. I said it was fine to me but it just wasn't acceptable to her. The next morning was her first day in the office and she was nervous and got up earlier to shower. I woke up to her screaming at me about the lack of hot water and she again blamed me for not doing the handover properly and said some hurtful stuff ("why can't you check something so simple?! What were you doing when you took over the place?!"). I was semi asleep, tired and stressed from moving in and dealing with her complaints. The hot water worked fine (it needed an extra minute to heat up) and I doused her hand with it (definitely not hot enough to cause any injury) and she yelled at me ("what are you doing are you crazy that's hot"). I got very mad and raised my voice at her for how she didn't appreciate all that I'd done for her so far in finding an apartment, unpacking and moving in. I stormed out and we both went to work separately and didn't speak until the evening when we returned home. We both pretended the argument didn't happen and just continued living together.
The above happened within the first two months of moving. The next few months saw more arguments as she complained about 1) the weather (it's hot but also stormy), 2) the food, 3) the cost of living , 4) the service standards. They were all fair points but I got very sick of hearing her complain about these every week without fail and I told her it's a different place and culture and I'm afraid it is what it is. Anyway I tried to accommodate her by buying a good fan/turning the AC on more often/paying and eating expensive-better food. Secondly, we also started arguing over our living habits - this was the first time we actually lived together under one roof, so some clashes were to be expected. It took us a while before we made some simple rules - this helped a bit but I think it wasn't much. For context, I do 1) 90% of grocery trips (she needs an hour to get ready to go to a supermarket that was 5mins away; I decided I'd rather do it alone and save the hassle) and so meant I paid for 90% of groceries too (most of which were her expensive cereal and milk and fruits; I mentioned this to her after a few weeks and she was appalled I was asking her to repay me the $30+ I spent on her breakfast every week), 2) 90% of the laundry (I went to office more than she did so I had more clothes to wash and hence I always initiated), of which most I folded and ironed myself after, 3) > 70% of the cleaning - when I lived alone I cleaned my apartment every weekend and I maintained this routine with her; I was normally the one wiping the floor and surfaces, cleaning the dishes and toilets and taking out the trash. She argues she also does a lot of cleaning and it happens when I sleep (I go to bed before midnight, she goes to bed at 1-2am) - I asked her to tell me what she did so I can appreciate it and she talked about tidying the table tops, washing the dishes, cleaning the floor, moving the cups and clearing leftover tissues on the tables. I have a bad habit with the last two points but I wouldn't consider them "cleaning" as it can literally be done in one minute. I said I don’t think we should leave dirty dishes until midnight either as that might attract insects (which she hates) but she said she’s too busy to clean it any earlier so I ended up cleaning them sometimes when I couldn’t stand it. Anyway, after many arguments I fixed my habits with the cup/tissue in recognition of how much it irked her. Still, I felt I was doing more than my fair share. Even worse, she rarely ever thanked me for doing any of these things. I felt like an errand boy and a servant. I was underappreciated and getting resentful. I told her several times how I felt (I tried to be polite and keep my snappiness in check) and she would counter "I clean the floor too, how come you don't thank me?" and I would ask “when? if you do it at 1am of course I won't know” (we both work from home so she definitely doesn't do it when I'm awake) and I can't tell if the floor has been cleaned when I wake up, it's not like I remember the position of strands of hair that was dropped on the floor. She could never give me a definite timing of when she cleaned the floor (“last time, recently”). Anyway, I decided to stop trying because it didn't work. I kept my feelings in and grew more resentful. Thirdly and lastly, simple conversations would turn into arguments. She recently got into branded stuff and she often shared her wishlist and asked what I thought. I know she was trying to get me involved in her interest and I participated the best I can even though my fashion sense is poor and I had zero knowledge about bags/style matching. However she often asked tough questions e.g. comparing two different shades of purple for the same design item. I would pick one of them, then she would say something good about the other piece/why it's more popular, so I said get the more popular one then, but she would say she likes the other more, etc. Basically we'd go round in circles and I end up switching my pick from one to the other and that annoys her to no end. After the first few times I told her to stop asking me because I clearly could not help her and my answers annoyed her but she insisted. In reaction to all of these I started to minimize conversations with her as I was fearful and sick of getting into an argument.
Then, around the 3-4 month mark since we moved, we found out my younger sister had stage 4 cancer. We banded around and did our best to support her. She responded well to chemo but was badly affected by the radiotherapy. She subsequently stayed with my gf and I to rest and recover as our apartment was tidy and quiet compared to my family home which was old and messy. However her stay drove my gf a bit mad. Firstly my family were visiting almost everyday to bring food and check in on her. Secondly she seemed comfortable at our place and my family were discussing to let her stay with us for a few months. My gf panicked. For context, she is very conscious about her image and when people are visiting she feels stressed. With my family popping in and out she needed to switch her persona on and off. Also, with my younger sister staying with us, she felt she couldn't be herself - watching TV til 1am, listening to music while working, etc. I told her to go ahead but just reduce the sound/dim the lights. She refused as she didn't want to risk disturbing my younger sister in any way (she is the type to not complain and just grit her teeth and take it). The result was that my gf, who had a stressful job, could not access her usual "de-stress activities" and she was afraid that this will continue for a while. I told her to just stay in the bedroom which was also her temporary study so she didn't have to see my family too much, plus she was busy with work anyway, plus if she's in the room she can play music no problem. Didn't work, she was upset and every night before I went to bed she would complain that she can't be herself. She also felt my family did not "appreciate us enough" for taking my younger sister in and caring for her. I was completely baffled, of course they were thankful but they didn't have to say it outright. She also said my family were "taking advantage" of me for having a spare bedroom and that I should not let her stay for too long - as the days went on I did feel it was hard for both of us to care for her properly as we both have work calls regularly; we were not giving her enough attention. I believe this was what my gf had meant/anticipated but I am really struck by her choice of words given her field in communications (i.e. she’s not careless with words), so I think she did really feel that way, but I couldn't comprehend why. She made another two or three remarks about my younger sistefamily that equalled rubbed me the wrong way. Anyway I ended up finding a place for my younger sister to stay near my brother who could care for her better (he had a helper and kind neighbours). She moved there after spending a month with us.
In the immediate week after my younger sister moved out, my gf charged into my study one evening complaining about our life together and how shit it was and how I was boring and difficult to talk to and depressing. Things needed to change. I asked for suggestions and she couldn't come up with any. I was resentful enough by then and told her "maybe we should spend time apart". That shut her up but she continued glaring at me without saying anything. I probably could have ended it there but I hate tension/confrontation and came up with a solution - I proposed an exercise outlined in the book "the five love languages". In short you take turns performing something in the other party's "love language" to help fill the "love battery" which fuels a happy relationship. She snapped "let me think about it" and returned to her work. For extra context, I read this book not long after we moved in together when things were bad; once I finished it I suggested she read it so we can discuss it and get out of the funk we're in. That was over four months ago; she had written it on the kitchen whiteboard on her to-do list; she never did it.
My younger sister's situation subsequently deteriorated and I started to reflect on my life and realized how unhappy I was with my gf and how life was short. I asked my gf for a chat and to follow up on her "thoughts" about doing the exercise - this was five weeks after we talked about it. She hadn't read the book and had no clue. I anticipated this and said she should consider going back to country A, she's clearly unhappy here and I've done what I can to appease her but clearly it's not enough. I also felt underappreciated and she never apologized at all whenever she yelled at me. I stopped short of saying "let's break up" but she knew where I was going and tried to change the tone, discussing our life goals and how they were similar (they were not quite the same to be very honest) and how we should use the whiteboard and write what we appreciate about the other person and what's a nice thing the other partner could do for you. I went along with it but I knew it wouldn't make much of a difference as she/I wouldn't act on what was written there.
Shortly after that, my gf got involved in a three-month long work project. It was important to her firm and involved multiple parties in different time zones and was highly stressful for her. Unfortunately my younger sister passed away not long after that. I had also decided around then that I had enough and summoned the courage to break up (I was generally fearful when dealing with her, I felt as if I was walking on egg shells), and I would do it after her project ended. In the meantime I would still support her as she stressed with her work. As she entered the last phase of her project she initiated a chat where she said she knew that our relationship was not in a good place and she promised to work on it after her project ended. I agreed but inside I still planned to end it when the project finished. I knew that if I told her my true intention, she would be crazy depressed/stressed with having to deal with the project and a break up at the same time, so I lied to her.
Fast forward to last weekend. She had to fly overseas for the final presentation of the project and I used this chance to move all my belongings back to my parent's place. I knew it was drastic but I also knew I needed to position myself in the best way to actually go through with it (I had tried to break up with her twice in our early dating history - in short I was young and wanted to fool around more but she had the makings of a good partner i.e. qualities I really admired and we had good chemistry; I was convinced by her that leaving would be a mistake). When she boarded her return flight I gave her a warning and said we needed to talk the evening she returned. Then she landed and got home and was horrified that I'd emptied my wardrobe.
We met in the evening and she shared how hurtful and underhanded my actions were, especially since I agreed with her that we would work on us when she came back. I told her I didn't want to give her another thing to worry about alongside her project and so I lied, and that I've actually been thinking to break up for a few months already. And I know my actions hurt her but she hurt me a lot as I've outlined above. I went through the major moments where she hurt me and surprisingly she said "yes I remember saying those things and hurting you". I asked why she never apologized all these while, she said she was "waiting for the right time" and when she was about to, my younger sister passed away so she decided to wait. Then her project went into overdrive. She said she was planning to make one big apology this Xmas. I said I didn't believe her. She said she knows she's not put enough effort into the relationship this year but it was also an extraordinarily stressful year for her (remember what I said about how she is very conscious about her image/surroundings? Now imagine her in a new country, new job, new colleagues, covid variants, lockdowns, unable to visit parents, my younger sister getting ill and passing away, and finally the big project; I don't deny that she was very stressed but I hate that she overanalyzes how people interact with her, it is simpy unnecessary and not helpful and a very stressful way to live). She really believed that with the end of the project she would finally be able to improve things between us. I said I wasn't sure as I was too hurt and resentful by now, and also it is naive to wait for a "perfect time" to work on us since life is unpredictable. What if something else happened as her project was ending? Do we wait another couple of weeks before doing anything?
We met again the next day and she said she finished reading the book about love languages (after I first raised it to her 8mths ago) and she finally realized why I was so adamant that she read it and she was eager to try out some of the suggestions in the book. She also shared how she misunderstood some of my younger sistefamily's behavior and finally realized the context and was regretful of her words (even though I have explained it to her many times when it first happened; she couldn't understand and just got mad that I wasn't taking her side). It was the first time in a long, long while that she agreed with me on anything personal and was humble and honest about her mistakes. It was refreshing, but I also know it took the impending doom of a break up for her to behave this way (in all our other chats this year she was defensive and refused to yield to anything), and I also noticed that she still didn't apologize, and that she still wants the relationship to end on her terms (I.e. we give it one final shot where there is finally no known events/distractions and if it doesn't work she will willingly accept the outcome).
I have been seeing a therapist for the past month to deal with the grief and resentment and depression. I have learnt that, due to some circumstances in my family growing up, I have a tendency to put my happiness second and others first, and I firmly held the belief that I need to suffework hard first before there was any form of rest/reward. And this is exactly how I have behaved in this relationship, except that there was no love/reward. I was resentful. I told my therapist I was sick and tired of the way I lived my life and i want it to change, and this is a strong factor driving my motivation to break up. However I also see that it has really been a tough year for her and she is correct in saying that, with the project ended, there is nothing to disturb/stress us out and we may finally have some sense of what it is like to live together under "normal times" and potentially be happy. I also do still believe she makes a good partner even though there are certain parts of her that I disapprove of (she likes to compare financial success; branded stuff; doesn't treat service staff very well) and find troublesome (she's a germophobe). However I also can't forget how badly she hurt me this year.
So, do you think I should give her another chance? Is it bad for me to end a six year relationship after being hurt for ten months and also for the sake of making the first step of my desire to change my life for the better? Does she deserve another shot after what has been a very eventful/stressful year? Or has she treated me badly enough that things will unlikely improve? Is there anything else I have not considered/should be asking?
To be honest I am struck by her tone now and I am sympathetic towards her but I’m exhausted and I don’t know if I can give her another chance. Even if I did, i don’t know if it will be a fair one since I will be sceptical of everything she does as I know she will be doing her best to please me and once things stabilise she might revert back to her old self.
P.s. her parents fought a lot when she was young and waited for her to graduate before getting a divorce. I read that children of divorcees tend to overanalyze everything as they grew up trying to figure out what to (not) do to prevent their parents from fighting. I feel this is spot on and i’ve found it to be a burden to her; when it comes to making big decisions she absolutely freezes and tries to think about every single detail obsessively. I can’t stand it. I know she's a good girl deep inside but she has a lot of issues and part of me wants to help her. But I also know it is not my duty and it is very exhausting to help someone through that.
Tldr: been together for six years, moved to my home country a year ago and it's been absolutely horrible (first time living together; she doesn't help financially; I do most of the chores; she's said a lot of hurtful stuff to me and also about my family; she rarely says thank you, never apologizes; she couldn't make the effort to read a short book about relationships for 8mths even though I pleaded with her to). We agreed to work on our relationship after her big project ended but i lied as I’d already decided I had enough. I’d also been speaking to a therapist and I was unhappy in my life and needed change. When the project ended I tried to break up with her. She then turned into a different person who actually listens and acknowledged her mistakes and admitted she knows she hurt me. She blames her bad behaviour mostly on the stress from the extraordinary events of the past year (new country, new job, new colleagues, new culture, new environment, my younger sister falling ill and passing away, her big project). She even finally read the book and told me she wants to do better and asked me to give her one more chance as there were no foreseeable stressful events for her which meant we could finally experience what a “normal life” together would be like. I am exhausted and sceptical that she can change enough to make me happy, and to maintain those changes for the rest of our lives. But I also see her logic, and the way she is talking to me now is exactly what I was looking for this whole year. Should I give her another chance?
submitted by throwaway_1morechanc to relationship_advice [link] [comments]
2021.12.09 10:41 idkwidk Druddigon right now! Adding 10! 0787 5578 5576 & 6104 1883 0997
2021.12.09 10:41 ShortAlgo $ENDP Waiting for Buy signal on ENDP https://t.co/B2b2kmyo0v
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2021.12.09 10:41 Melodymelilot It actually doesn't make any sense!!!!!
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2021.12.09 10:41 FatGoatt The Corruption Shall Not Win This Time!
The corrupted have grown in strength and numbers. They have decided to invade the territory of Weavers Fen!
Govenor Akithano, Defender of the West, Queen of the Swamp, First of her Name......has gathered her troops to defend against the corrupted invasion!
Server: Topan Faction: Syndicate
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2021.12.09 10:41 trailer8k Joe biden Drone bombing with lgbt and BLM stickers this time
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2021.12.09 10:41 Hanomag75 Did we just get hosed?
I don't see any posts here and I used the dopey search engine so...
Whats up with the changes to the legendary mod system!!?
Theres no mention of this in the notes. Am I to believe that I just went from a guaranteed 3 star to a possible 1-2 or 3? Please tell me Im wrong.
submitted by Hanomag75 to fo76 [link] [comments]
2021.12.09 10:41 kerrigan24 Took the TRX4 to 9369 feet
2021.12.09 10:41 Content-Flamingo4648 Is being a pediatric nurse attractive to women?
I'm just curious how my career would be viewed, I guess It makes me good with kids, though another problem is that I'm not tall or hot
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2021.12.09 10:41 ugly-volvo-driver I need that!
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2021.12.09 10:41 SoupySuntable What's the worst advice you ever listened to? What happened?
2021.12.09 10:41 Zripwud iwtl how to get better at crpgs
Hello! I've been gaming my whole life, I've even had a decent career as a "game journalist" in my country. So I love games of all genres. I mostly love narrative in games and atmosphere. But in the last few years I have grown to appreciate CRPGs a lot, they're like playing a full on novel, like LOTR, Name of the Rose or Dune, big books with great world building.
The first one I truly devour was Dragon Age Origins, but it was with Pillars of Eternity that I fell in love with the genre, for itrs expansive lore and combat. But the truth is I ABSOLUTELY SUCK AT RULE SETS. I'm a language dork and pretty bad at numbers.
What I want to learn is to start with the basics about rule sets in this kind of games. What resources should I pull to start with very basic understanding and go from there upwards? Please help me! I'm even looking to get better at math to understand systems better!
Sorry for my english and if I didn't comply with a subreddit rule, first time posting!
submitted by Zripwud to CRPG [link] [comments]
2021.12.09 10:41 JediSureya General discussion for Strixhaven DM’s
I wanted to open this post to create a discussion between DM’s who are planing to run a Strixhaven campaign. What are your thoughts on the book?